Fun loving 5′ 7″ 23-year-old California native hottie Allie Haze, who took home the honors of XRCO’s Best New Starlet award this year, has been signed by Vivid Entertainment as their newest exclusive Vivid Girl.  Allie Haze is the 2nd exclusive contract girl to be signed this year, with Charlie Sheen’s mistress hooker, Capri Anderson being added to Vivid’s roster in March.  Allie will begin making movies exclusively for the studio.

This is a new move for Vivid Entertainment as they head back into the fray of signing exclusive stars to the Vivid brand:   “We decided to bring back exclusive stars only if they were very exceptional, and Allie is a prime example,” said Steven Hirsch, Vivid co-founder and chairman.  He added, “Our two top directors, Axel Braun and B. Skow, brought her to my attention independently of each other. We met with her and immediately knew she was incredibly special. We are all delighted she’s on board and we think that Vivid fans will be excited by her sexy beauty and irrepressibly happy personality.”

Vivid said that after college Haze worked as a bartender and did nude modeling to help pay her tuition.
“I’d always thought I was bi-sexual, so when I was offered some good money to be with a woman on camera, I was really up for it.  I liked it so much that it led to my finding an agent who helped me get more work with women,” Haze said.

When Allie Haze was 18-years young, she got married to a preacher.  Allie had this to say about her early marriage:  ”I married a preacher when I was 18, and that turned out to be a big mistake, especially from the sexual side of the relationship.  We were divorced by the time I was 20.  It felt like I was let out of a cage.  Up to then I never thought much about sex, or had even a passing interest in adult entertainment.”

Following in the footsteps of other Adult film stars like Sasha Grey, Allie Haze has branched out into the mainstream feature film market under the name Brittney Joy, and will be starring in seven feature films which will be shown later this year at Cannes Film Festival.

The lovely Kristina Rose tweeted a picture of her Macbook resting on her hairy cunt. Its a shame twitgoo didn’t allow it to stay live for long, but behold the sexyness that is that photo I was able to save!

Great Macbook Stand Option

You can follow Kristina Rose on her sexy tweets at /KristinaRosexxx and check out the 106 movies we have Kristina in!

I like my women like I like my pancakes: stacked three high and covered in buttery syrup.  I’ve never had the pleasure of banging three gals at once, but mark my words, before the ends comes I will make it happen.  Some people pay monthly into life insurance; I pay monthly into my hooker foursome fund.

You guys be the bricks, I’ll provide the mortar

Yep, once my investments mature, I’m on a plane to Amsterdam.  I can’t wait.  I can see it now: me walking into the classiest whore house I can find smoked out of my skull, smacking down my huge wad of cash, and telling– (continue reading…)

Is it me or do some barely legal gals radiate feel-good-pussy times?  Take this one for example.  Her name is Charlotte Stokely and she’s more or less my dream teen babe (despite being 23ish now).  Look at those naturally rosy cheeks, that milky skin, that flaxen hair, and that hard body.  I think I just came a little bit.

That's right, I'm blushing

Yep, she sure is peach.  Do you have any idea what I’d do to that ass?  One word: EPIC!  I’d eat it like a sandwich.  I’d run through it like a stop sign in Siberia.  I’d pack it  like I pack my lunch—with extra meat.  I’d play it like a trumpet.  I’d toss it like a coin, calling both head and tails.  I think you get the picture.

As I get older, I find myself suddenly desiring a badass sofa or a classy yet kooky bookshelf.  I’ve even spent a few Saturday afternoons wondering the cavernous maze of my local IKEA, turning down invites to booze it up with my buddies in the process.  Pathetic, I know.  That being said, furniture is kind of neat, especially pieces like the one below.

Got this one in the “as is” section.

Yep, growing up sure is interesting.  Just the other day I sat down and watched a bit of the Olympics… speed skating.  I enjoyed the commentary…  I felt like offing myself afterwards…  Old age, it sneaks up on you, but at least I have my electric dildo ottoman, which so happens to match my Morocco leather chair set.

It seems like yesterday when I fingerbanged my first female.  What a day that was!  I clearly recall how potently my digits stunk after the fact: they were both sweet and sour, a savory reminder to carry with me until I washed my hands or scratched my balls.  Ah, the memories!  It’s a shame you couldn’t go back and do it all over again.

As you can see, I'm very flexible

On the subject of time travel, if I did so happen to have DeLorean DMC-12, fully equipped with a flux-capacitor and a Mr. Fusion, there would be a whole lot more things I’d like to do besides going back and re-fingerbanging a few barely legal bitches.  Call– (continue reading…)

Friends help each other out; it’s the golden rule and it applies to every situation, including when you’re tag teaming some ungodly whore.  Here’re the circumstances: bitches twat is a little dry.  It should be, she’s just had a couple of pool cues up in there.  Your bud is having some trouble getting deep penetration, with his dick catching on parched labia.  Personally, you’re all good with your sausage snaked halfway down girlie’s throat.  What do you do?

Don’t forget this, Fred, when I need some gas money

Of course, the asshole thing to do is nothing and enjoy your hearty suck without distraction, but this course of action isn’t gonna get you any points with your friend.  The honorable thing to do, naturally, is holding those– (continue reading…)

Okay, so can a shaved head lesbian be a little old-fashioned?  Is it crazy for me to expect my ladies to spend a good portion of their time in the kitchen cooking up crazy complicated dish for yours truly?  Hey, pussy is like Chinese food, I’m still hungry even after I eat a whole slew of it.

Turkey baster? What turkey baster?

The moral of this story: horny women are allowed to be sexist to other horny women if there’s a meal involved, especially if– (continue reading…)

Jizz, what can’t you do?  Condition hair, slick a cunt for maximum enjoyment, generate Jackson Pollock inspirited body art, provide much needed protein for hungry bitches, oh, and the whole create human life thing—frankly, there’s no end to your usefulness!

Yeah, I walk around like this. What's it to ya?

Few sights awe me as much as a cum speckled mouth.  That being said, I’ll be the first one to admit that at times it totally grosses me out.  Straight up, it’s all about– (continue reading…)

I look at porn all day long–it’s my job, I do for 40 hours a week—and you’d think I’d get sick of it after a while, and to tell you the truth, there are the days that I drag my ass getting work, loathing the thought of yet another epic smut submersion, but, without fail, I make it to my desk, and then, if I’m lucky, it happens: the perfect vagina, like the one featured in the below picture.  Suddenly my chakras fall back into ball busting alignment and I’m good to go for the next little bit.

As if she needs to wet that dildo

Of course, I have to make my usually criticism.  Eyes open girls; my masturbation requires a sight line to the soul.  Sure, I can appreciate the fact that she’s in the throws of– (continue reading…)