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Archive for July, 2014

Programmer stops staring at boobs, you won’t believe what happens next

by on Jul.15, 2014, under AdultRental News

We blocked all porn from our programmers computers and after a month of twitching and dry humping the cubicle walls we finally got the some shit done.

This week we get to start showing off some of the advances that will make you hornier than Ron Jeremy at an all you can eat buffet.

I’m so fancy. You already know.
Our fancy new player allows you to change video quality, but more importantly – have thumbnails! No more having to scroll down the page to find that special something to get your motor humming.
Hover your mouse over the progress bar and see the action in the back section.

huge-boobs-galore

We’re in the process of adding millions of thumbnails, so for now you have the 20-30 thumbs available, but in the future you will have all your heart desires.

In the Fast Lane
We added 2 brand spanking new streaming video servers backed by super duper strong storage servers.Buffering time and video playback issues should be massively improved.
We also moved the main website to giant beefy servers with abs of steel and pumped our database servers so full of Viagra they’ll be banging for a long, long time.

Dim the lights*
Besides the video player updates we’ve also started updating around the player and the rest of the site. We removed the no longer necessary “settings” button and replaced it with an option to “Dim the Lights”. Sometimes you don’t really want full screen, but all that white is glaring at you. We also made your history click-able, I know, nice right?

*I was going to keep going with the Iggy Azalea, Fancy play on words, but I didn’t like where “Can’t you taste this gold?” brought me.

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